There's this new blog, called Atlanta Politics Online. It seems to be a band of people who have banded together to hate me. Yes- they are Barry haters.
An example from a "Dr. Dave" - "I’m a democrat. I have a $20 million vacation playground on Martha’s Vineyard and a guarded compound in South Chicago and belong to the richest majority in Washington’s history. But I hate rich people who aren't democrats and want your property too so I can save endangered swamp rats and build turtle tunnels and fix toilets. You owe me."
I'm not sure- but I think he might have meant me. I mean I live on the south side of Chicago and am currently blogging from the Vineyard. I'm sure it could be millions of people, but I just have this uneasy feeling that it is me he is talking about.
I do have a Doctor named Dave. I happened to have an appointment with him today. He is my proctologist. I'm still in my young 40's, so this is the first time I met him. It was "uncomfortable."
I walked into the office and, being the president, I got to skip in line. They handed me a paper robe and asked me to sit on the table. Dr. Dave asked me if I had any trouble urinating. I told him not since I had the clap. He thought I was joking, and to be honest I wish I was. That's the last time I drink so much that I pass out at Camp David. It's a good thing that Geithner was watching over me when I woke up. Although I kind of wish that he had clothes on and wasn't spooning me (he said it was to protect me).
Anyhow, the doctor asks me to bend over the table, I think oh, good, my knees have been hurting, maybe he can take a look. You won't believe what Dr. Dave did next! He, ah, invaded my personal space. I felt a latex, thing of some sort penetrating my, ah, nether reaches.
He said it was to check my prostate. It must be hard to check though. I mean, I felt his hands on my hips pushing in the prostate probe.
What a long day. At least Dr. Dave was happy. He said the exam was on the house, and that he just wanted to help me the same way with my health care as I am helping everyone else. What a great guy!
Barry O For President 2012
7 comments:
Hey, Barry O. Nothing personal...you just need some bitch slapping.
:)
BTW: I found that someone swiped my piece when I wrote it last month and rewrote it a bit and posted it as her own. Here's my lovely response (I'm such a giving guy).
I tweeted your dilema to the Barry O army, which is just like the US army, except smaller, less compitent, and a figment of my imagination...
I'm also writting a piece discussing over at APO- amazing. Why did she even bother changing any of the words???
Just now getting to finish reading your post.
I have to say, giving you the finger up your wazoo was just repaying all the times you keep sticking the Constitution up mine.
:)
You live a disturbing life Barry0. Yikes.
Ananda-
Why, what do you mean? Isn't this an everyday occurence?
Oh, Barry O! Dr. Dave did for you what we have all wanted done to you. I can't imagine why you would find that uncomfortable. Did he use the correct digit?
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