Medvedev and NATO muscle flexing

I hadn't noticed it before, but there is a bright red phone on my desk.
It's labeled "hotline". I initially thought it was for room service. I
feeling a little hungry, so I picked it up today. To my astonishment, I
was immediately connected to my buddy Medvedev- the leader of Russia.

We explained the normal pleasantries, and Medvedev shared that he was
just getting ready to call me. He said "Vlad" was also there. So, I said
"Hello" and asked what was on their mind.

He said they were concerned by the War Games in Georgia. War is Gate's
department, so I asked the to wait while I called Secretary Gates. I
noticed there was no hold button on the old red phone, so I started
singing "The Girl From Ipanema" while we waited.

When I sung "Tall and tan and young and lovely," Putin says, "Why thank
you, you know I still work out..." and Medvedev says "How do you know
he's not talking to me- I'm the president."

That seemed to make Putin angry- "He's not talking to you, pig. He knows
that you are just a figurehead-"

Medvedev then tried to interrupt "But-" then I heard what sounded like a
sand filed suck hitting a mound of ground beef.

"Dmitry is napping, now" said Putin. "I have the authority to speak for
him"

"Oh, I said. "I don't really have the authority to talk without someone
else in the office, so we'll have to wait"

Vlad just laughed and said "O, Barry O, you cannot possibly be the
simpleton that it seems. Let us talk about the manly arts, drinking
vodka, working out, our first kills..."

Fortunately, Gates got there just about then- Vlad was making me a
little uncomfortable. Medvedev woke up right then too.

"We need to talk about your puppets participating in war games in
Georgia."

I answered "Are the Muppets in Atlanta?" in my most serious tone. I knew
this was important.

Medvedev answered "I love that little green fellow 'Hermit', I think he
is called." That's when I heard the 'meat/sock' sound again.

Gates went on to explain that the war games were peaceful- Vlad still
seemed agitated. I guess we'll just have to see how this turns out...